Vulnerability can actually make you happier. What can Americans—especially followers of Jesus Christ—do in a time when it seems that our very republic is more fragile than ever before? November 4, 2014 November 4, 2014. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Happily Ever After is for you to create, every single day of your life. Please make sure all fields are filled out. Whatever we love will give the gift of pain somewhere along the road. Letting ourselves feel happy is often a way to feel more vulnerable, not less. Lewis. It takes no bravery or resilience at all. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. But in that casket—safe, dark, motionless, airless—it will change. The definition of ‘vulnerable’ from the Cambridge dictionary is: ‘able to be easily physically, emotionally, or mentally hurt, influenced or attacked.. but we remember who were the ones who first loved us, and which ones of them still do. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. The Gospel Coalition supports the church by providing resources that are trusted and timely, winsome and wise, and centered on the gospel of Jesus Christ. Affiliate disclosure: As an Amazon Associate, we may earn commissions from qualifying purchases on Amazon.com. Lewis. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. Family members die and leave us. I regularly dreamed that something would happen to my fiancé. How to be vulnerable with a man? Spouses disappoint us. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. But who would live sealed in spiritual cellophane just to keep from ever being hurt? All to defend against feeling vulnerable. The point is that I rarely allow myself to be vulnerable with other people. If love is worth the risk, as it always, always is, then we must choose to become vulnerable and allow Jesus to break open our wounds, exposing them to the possibility of rejection but also to the possibility of acceptance and conversion. Make it your best one yet. It is the result of loving Jesus. God didn’t fashion us void of feelings and emotions. Vulnerable Lyrics Meaning. Vulnerability begets love. I think it is safe to say that in this life we all experience heartbreak. Yet deep within our souls we know we weren’t created for such a lonely existence. Yeah, this is why you’re known as an asshole. In the months leading up to my wedding I had a recurring dream. The only place outside of heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers and perturbations of love is hell. The Countries Where It’s Most Dangerous to Be a Christian in 2021, The FAQs: What Christians Should Know About QAnon, The Fantasy Ideology of the American Insurrectionists, Damn the Curse of Ham: How Genesis 9 Got Twisted into Racist Propaganda. “To love at all is to be vulnerable,” says C.S. That makes love hard. To love at all is to be vulnerable. Lewis, The Four Loves. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. Shall we shut our doors to love, then and ‘be safe’?” That’s the only alternative, really. When we numb feelings like fear, embarrassment and pain, we also numb excitement, hope, gratitude and happiness. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. It can be scary to show those sides to … When we love Jesus, our love will flow out to others (1 John 4:20). It wasn’t good for Adam to be alone because the Trinity isn’t alone. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Children rebel against us. She is unsure of what other party’s intention might be … This isn’t a new concept. Your heart is more vulnerable, but the love is worth it. A mother can love through the difficult months of pregnancy and the agonizing hours of labor because she knows at the end of the pain comes the baby she loves so deeply. For the First time in New Zealand! “To love at all is to be vulnerable. The only alternative would be to live without love—to be alone forever. We are all constantly changing, sometimes in ways we can’t control, even if we wanted to. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. For all eternity Father, Son, and Holy Spirit have enjoyed perfect love and fellowship that we, by our nature as divine image bearers, crave as well. Links circulating on Whatsapp and … For Lewis, and for us, love means opening our hearts to pain and sorrow. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. She is married to Daniel, has four sons, and together they belong to Immanuel Baptist Church in Little Rock, Arkansas. Everything in life is uncertain, and the most uncertain and fallible thing is probably our feelings. Friends betray us. In The Path of Loneliness she writes, “To love means to open ourselves to suffering. Elisabeth Elliot knew better than most what it meant to love and lose. A truly vulnerable person only seeks for love within, which already makes them a courageous, resilient person. So also Christ loved through the darkest moments of the cross because he knew at the end he’d be glorified and his people would be redeemed. As I shared my fears with a dear friend who had been married longer than I had, she spoke these encouraging words: Every time you open your heart to love like you are now doing, you open your heart to more hurt and pain. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It’s not just… But then again, what is a good ending? Jesus is not asking … Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, accountability, and authenticity. The alternative to tragedy, or at least to the risk of tragedy, is damnation. And we are grateful. vulnerable meaning: 1. able to be easily physically, emotionally, or mentally hurt, influenced, or attacked: 2. able…. I think it speaks so clearly about what it means to love anyone or anything. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. One is that love makes us feel vulnerable, which then scares us. In The Four Loves he writes: There is no safe investment. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Being sexually vulnerable means choosing love, not choosing the other, but choosing love, and being willing to meet those inner barriers with love. It can be losing a loved one, a breakup, a major disappointment, or just sharing in someone else’s pain. Christians can love with the same freedom. When firmly rooted in its foundations, this is the kind of love that can last through the seasons. Clem Onojeghuo. You will probably get hurt, most likely disappointed, but what’s living if you aren’t going to love in the full capacity you are capable of? Let yourself feel everything with full intensity. It’s a choice you make every day to decide to continue loving, to deal with all their little quirks and flaws, in the same way you would want yours to be overlooked. Sometimes it seems easier and more logical to just not love anyone at all. We often react by withdrawing into ourselves, or by withholding our loving behavior, or by trying to control our partner’s loving behavior. It was a nightmare, really. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Loving another does not ensure unending happiness. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. And we dare to be vulnerable to love … Vulnerability means that you’re willing to jump headfirst into love. It comes in many forms and over many different things. It’s the only way to live. To love at all is to be vulnerable. But when it comes to actually being vulnerable in real life, many of us struggle to open up. To give them the power to destroy you or rebuild you. Don’t rely on anyone or anything to create it for you. Join David Tian on the “DTPHD Podcast” as we explore deep questions of meaning, success, truth, love, and the good life. Because they have opened up all the closed doors within themselves, and accepted that they are indeed worthy of self-love and love from others, they can offer it openly and genuinely to other people. To Love is to be Vulnerable. When we allow ourselves to be completely open and vulnerable, we benefit, our relationships improve, and we may even become more attractive. Submit your writing to be published on Thought Catalog. You have to take the risk and ultimately know that your happiness is dependent upon you and your mindset. To love is to be vulnerable.” – C.S. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. Anyone can leave. That’s just the way we live, the way we have been conditioned to feel and carry out our lives. While there’s no promise of cost-free love, we know the deeper purpose behind it all. We naturally desire companionship, affection, fellowship. If we only chose to love in situations free from vulnerability, we’d never love at all. By subscribing, you agree to the terms of our Privacy Statement. When Disciplining Kids Doesn’t Seem to Make a Difference. We become vulnerable, and then we love. That requires a tender or a vulnerable heart. Feeling all … Usually, right when we’re at the moment of being vulnerable, we bail. There’s so much meaning behind it and it’s something I struggle with innately. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Learn more. We can’t pretend as Christians that we’re immune to the ravages of sin, death, and sorrow any more than we can retreat from all things relational. This is the official definition of being vulnerable. “To love is to be vulnerable. You’re willing to give someone half your heart. All of this requires opening our souls to others, thus making us susceptible to relational pain. In fact, Christians more than anyone else can love with reckless abandon since we know this isn’t all there is. Fast forward four years and I’m now the mother of twin boys. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. To be vulnerable (and then to be accepted and understood) is the seed of love. The reason why some of us so much love children is that we feel an intrinsic comfort in the presence of authenticity. “Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. You may unsubscribe at any time. This is because when we sense danger, we move away from it. You can read more of her writing on her blog or follow her on Twitter. You have to take responsibility for it. They posted a quote by C.S. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. CORONAVIRUS vaccine cheats are skipping the jab queue by using an IT loophole, an investigation has claimed. Lewis in the “The Four Loves”. For over a decade, David Tian, Ph.D., has helped hundreds of thousands of people from over 87 countries find happiness, success, and fulfillment in their social, professional, and love … Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. Copyright © 2021 The Gospel Coalition, INC. All Rights Reserved. "Any love makes us vulnerable. Avoiding it in an effort to feel good doesn’t work. To love is to be vulnerable.” ― C.S. This is why the pain of loneliness is often too much to bear. To last in love is to not give up. Being vulnerable in a relationship means allowing your partner to know you fully: your thoughts, feelings, challenges, weaknesses. So happy or sad, vulnerability happens. You have to be vulnerable because you’re choosing to be vulnerable. But that’s the point. He experienced the greatest pain imaginable—the death of his only Son—so that we could be made right with him. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Like many other expecting and new moms, I struggle with nagging fear that something tragic will happen to my babies. CS Lewis has a famous quote from The Four Loves that begins with “To love at all is to be vulnerable …” He says that if you want to protect yourself, you can’t love anything at all, not even a pet, especially not a parrot. The fear to be let down after being truly opened to another person It’s hard. Choose The One Who Can Love You The Way You Need, 10 Things I Learned About Love From Watching My Friends Get Their Hearts Broken, The Truth About Intimacy And HS, From Someone Who Has Had It For 23 Years, 18 Quotes About Vulnerability That Will Inspire You To Be Brave, What Happens When You Make Yourself Vulnerable, To Say ‘Yes’ To Love Is To Say ‘Yes’ To Pain, This Is Why Strong Girls Are The Most Vulnerable In Love, A Quote That Will Completely Change The Way You Think About Love. “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Trust is a big word. While I had my fair share of dreams about my dress not fitting or forgetting to complete some vital detail, the one that haunted me was much darker. Courtney Reissig is the author of Glory in the Ordinary: Why Your Work in the Home Matters to God, The Accidental Feminist: Restoring Our Delight in God’s Good Design, and Teach Me to Feel: Worshiping Through the Psalms in Every Season of Life (January 2020). The good news is that there's no better place to be sweetly 'held' in choosing love than The Making Love Retreat . Vulnerability is regarded as a key ingredient in healthy, fulfilling relationships. Now, the danger your body senses is you becoming emotionally attached and developing feelings. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. (I may have added the last bit.) It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To guard our hearts so that nothing can hurt us. That’s always an option, but not the one I recommend. Yet we do so anyway because deep within we know we were built for more than solitary existence. Vulnerability means you’re comfortable crying over the things that upset you instead of pushing away all of your emotions. I would wake up haunted by the thought that the man I loved so deeply would either die tragically or leave me for someone else. You just have to love other people where they are at. But, it can also be beautiful, exhilarating and the best thing you ever decide to do. Learn about us. But love also begets vulnerability. When God created Adam, he declared it wasn’t good for him to be alone (Gen. 2:18). To keep going, and when something is working, take the time to fix it. For example, if we dare to love someone, we are vulnerable to the pain of being rejected. Be vulnerable. C. S. Lewis understood it well. There, the God who is love became vulnerable for sinners like you and me. Let’s learn the meaning behind the lyrics of the song ‘Vulnerable’ by Selena Gomez section-wise. How do you show vulnerability without crossing over into needy territory? Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. If my life were so richly blessed, there is an abundance of this kind of love and I would never have to feel vulnerable. 12:2). “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. For once we love someone, they have the unique power to hurt us as nobody else can. When the relationship is severed, it causes us to question who we are. Our hearts laid bare to vulnerability is not the end of the story. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. He knew the joy that awaited if he loved to the end (Heb. It’s scary, and at times it’s downright depressing. Contrary to what many folks were raised to believe, vulnerability is a measure of strength and courage, not weakness. Here’s why you need to be vulnerable to fall in love: 1. We were made to love and be loved. [Verse 1] ‘Selena’ starts by talking about being scared of investing in new relations. I’ve had my heart broken many times, and i’m sure I still have a few more to go through before I find my “happy ever after”. To be created in God’s image means to desire fellowship. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. But a quick look around reminds us that something is tragically wrong. And on my most frightened days, I’m reminded of those wise words from my friend—to love is to be vulnerable. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. If you’re going to be in a relationship, you might as well get used to speaking your mind and pouring out your soul to this person or else you should definitely stay single. But locking ourselves up and never facing another person won’t fix what’s really going on in our souls. You’ll reap the rewards. This is one of my favorite quotes from C.S. Instead, according to Brené Brown (2015), writer and vulnerability researcher, “vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity.” It gives us hope, provides a sense of belonging, enables us to feel empathy, and provides meaning in our lives. Dedicated to your stories and ideas. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Obviously we can strive to control our defensive reaction. Anyone can give up. Lewis, “To love is to be vulnerable.” Then they said something along the lines of “so true, this is why I can’t open up to you.” DON’T GIVE UP SO EASILY. we do not focus on who hurt us, whether in the past or the present or potentially in the future. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love another is a choice. Learn more about working with Thought Catalog. To love someone in such a way, you have to take control of it. Nowadays we are all concerned with the latest and greatest things we can get our hands on. Nowhere do we see this more clearly than at Calvary. We see the other person’s willingness to be vulnerable, and then we love.